Last night I went to go see Immortals… For the amount of entertainment I got out of the film, I could just end the post here, but where would be the fun in that?

To say I was disappointed is a kindness that I’m not sure the film deserves. My problem is, I went in expecting it to be 100% knock-my-socks-off amaze-balls. It wasn’t. My socks were still on at the end. I keep forgetting that I mustn’t get my hopes up and then when a film like this is actually amazing (300 blew my mind!!!), my faith in filmmakers is happily restored. (Not sure if I like the fact that I am now blaming myself for all the bad films I’ve seen… must rethink this.)

Initially, I wasn’t expecting much. But then part of the marketing ploy of the studio was to say that Immortals was made by the same producers as 300. Did I mention that 300 blew my mind? It did. Now my expectations were high, very high.

I’m still not completely sure why Immortals failed to be awesome. It had all the right elements of an action epic:

Evil villain – check

Good looking heroes – check

Epic story of good v. evil – check

Thin storyline with vague references to history – check

So what happened? Well, first of all, the whole story was about finding this weapon of the gods – the Epirus Bow. I’ve never heard of it before, but I liked the concept of this really cool bow that doesn’t need arrows and is super powerful. But when they found it… It looked like the props people had let a 15 year old girl from the early 90s attack it with a monochromatic bedazzler. Not cool.

Couple that with the fact that the females in the movie were pretty much useless (even the goddess Athena was rather bland) and the reluctant hero wasn’t exactly believably reluctant. Oh, and there was a major flaw with the whole military strategy behind the big battle scene at the end which annoyed me no end. If I can spot that, as a a 20-something woman from the 21st century, then I think the scriptwriters and researchers for the movie should’ve seen it the issue. There was just too much meh and not enough “holy shit that was cool” for me to love this movie even a little bit, and I really wanted to.

I will say that Mickey Rourke was pretty bad ass and added a level of cool to the movie as Hyperion – the seriously disturbed bad guy. And Zeus, Apollo and Poseidon were cool when they were battling the Titans. These elements reminded me of the epic awesome that was so abundant in 300, but they weren’t enough to save Immortals unfortunately.

If you’re going to watch it, the effects are pretty cool and there are enough good looking bodies on display for men and women to enjoy to make it a passable 2 hours. Just don’t expect your socks to be blown off.

If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go re-watch 300 and remind myself of the awesome.

A few months ago I was cast in the play Separate Tables by Terrence Rattigan and the other night I got to watch the 1958 film version. It was really quite interesting to see how they portrayed the character I’ve been working on for months and how the other characters evolved in the film.

The most interesting part though, was how the film script swapped lines between characters – completely changing the emphasis and meaning of the lines. In fact, the character I’m playing, Mrs Anne Shankland, was quite likable in the film. In the play, she is seriously flawed and has very few redeeming features, the same as her love interest, John Malcolm.

The story in the film revolves around 2 love stories – the one between Anne and John, and another between Sybil and Major Pollock. These stories are quite different and don’t really have anything to do with each other. In the play, the first love story runs its course during the first act and the other in the second act, 18 months later. They don’t come together at all.

Knowing the play as well as I do now, I found the film very fluffy and too nice. But then again, it is a 1950s Hollywood film (set in England but they decided to Americanise Anne and John), so I guess it makes sense that the film is ‘nicer’ for lack of a better word. I just found it all a bit odd because the playwright was heavily involved in writing the screenplay…

Nevertheless, I did quite like the film. I love classic Hollywood and I think the 1950s were one of the most glamorous eras – women were just beautiful then.

(And  I’ll admit to being kinda nervous about living up to the image of Rita Hayworth as I take on the same character as her… meep)

I finally got round to watching The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus the other night – WOW! It is such an incredible film!I enjoyed every moment and it delivered on every front; great actors, great visuals, great story, great everything.

Being a Monty Python fan, any offering from Terry Gilliam is a must watch for me and with the host of amazing actors ready to step in and help fill the void after Heath Ledger passed away, I just knew this film was going to be weird, whacky and wonderful.

The way Gilliam wove the actors in to cover the loss of Ledger was really ingenious, and in this film, it made complete sense!

For a wonderful ride through the different and abnormal, do yourself a favour and give this a watch!

(You’ll note I haven’t even mentioned what the storyline is, and that’s because it isn’t about the story. This film is an experience!)

One of my favourite comedy shows growing up was How to Irritate People. I have watched that show about a million times (and I really don’t think I’m exaggerating) and I still find it hilarious!

I first saw a video of this comedy show when I quite little and, having already been brought up watching Monty Python, I didn’t need much encouragement to watch it again and again. Now some of the sketches are so ingrained in my brain that I can’t always immediately distinguish between Python and Irritate…

I’ve done a bit of research and discovered that Irritate was a precursor to Monty Python. Anyone who was alive and conscious at the time will tell you that this was John Cleese and Graham Chapman just testing the waters with their particular brand of insanity, just a taste of what is to come with Monty Python and all that followed after Python’s success. To me, How to Irritate People is bloody funny and anyone with 2 brain cells to rub together should watch it for a jolly good laugh… A game of ‘eye spy’ will never be the same again!

(*And if you’re wondering, yes, I would love a copy of the DVD for my birthday)

I watched this Wesley Snipes movie last night… And right from the horridiously cheesey opening credits, I knew it was going to be on the awful end of the scale. I continued watching in the hopes that it may be a candidate for MAAME, but not even The Daywalker (AKA Wesley Snipes) could make this movie awesome…

From the ridonkulous premise to thin (being extraordinarily kind with this word) plot line, I can’t for the life of me understand why this film ever got made! Why on earth Wesley Snipes decided to star in it is beyond me… Maybe he lost a bet, or, as the single reviewer on IMDB put it, maybe he was running out of money in 2005. Who knows?

So you want to know the premise? Come on, let’s have a good laugh:)

Basically a nuclear facility in Russia is taken over by Chechnyan rebels and because there are some American scientists working there, the American military has to sort the problem out before the rebels blow up the plant and kill thousands… Um… I’m sorry, but how is a plant possibly going nuclear on Russian soil a problem for Americans???

Another thing that made me chuckle is that Wesley Snipes’s character doesn’t get a name… He is merely known as The Painter – So why the hell is the movie called The Marksman???

Anyhoo, for more of a good laugh, have a look at the oopsies they made as listed by IMDB.